cry baby

Is it usual to cry in the movie theater? or even when watching TV? or am I a cry baby? I think I have found tears running down my cheeks more often in the last year or so. Is this some kind of stress relief my body has come up with or am I over-analyzing? I don't usually cry in front of others so may be others cry while I am not around. I guess there's no way to really know ...

open policy

I love these open policies at school. Check out as many books as you want from the library. Work anytime you like wherever you wish. Take as long as you want with whatever you need. Think of it, we had to beg the lab assistant for extra time in the lab ...

two notes

• I don't know what to say except that I can only hope for this to be true.
• A few quotes from our beloved Dr Barkeshli.

day and night

How would you feel if someone flipped your day and night randomly? I was thinking about the plants I have in my bathroom. I mean, it's daytime when someone's in the bathroom and it's night otherwise. That is a rather random daylight pattern. Will this affect their growth? Does it harm them in any way? I wonder ....

my land

I have been thinking about my homeland a lot these days. I have talked to people with very different views. But I can feel that none of it took away the worry in me. May be as Amin said I need to wait to see what will come up.

There's just too much belonging in me to sit and watch. It's not like it's an issue that doesn't concern me. As much as I know I can't do anything, I can't stop thinking about it .... what is going to happen to my beloved land?

fair?

A friend informed me that one of our best professors at Sharif University has passed away. Dr Barkeshli was in a short description a great human being. We, as students, all admired him. He was a person you could turn to when you needed help. It is a great loss for all of us ... May he rest in peace ...
This reminded me of more than a year ago when we lost a professor at SFU. He too was young. An energetic teacher, who made my arrival in Canada much more pleasant than I could have imagined. I still think of him when I walk through the corridors, past the room which was once his office ...

hold on

I don't know, but the elections kind of got me in the mood for the song:

Hold On To My Heart (Wasp)

There's a flame, flame in my heart
And there's no rain, can put it out
And there's a flame, it's burning in my heart
And there's no rain, ooh can put it out

So just hold me, hold me, hold me

Take away the pain, inside my soul
And I'm afraid, so all alone
Take away the pain, that's burning in my soul
Cause I'm afraid that I'll be all alone

So just hold me, hold me, hold me
Hold on to my heart, to my heart, to me
Hold on to my heart, to my heart, to me

And oh no, don't let me go
Cause all I am you hold in your hands,
And hold me and I'll make it through the night
And I'll be alright,

Hold on, hold on to my heart

کاسه داغتر از آش

والا من شرمنده ملت ایرانم ولی آخه شماها دیگه ... نمی دونم ... سرم داره درد می گیره ... بچه ها منتظرند برم ببینم ... چی ببینم؟ دیگه همینه دیگه و خوب لابد ... آخه

i like to move it move it

I went to see Madagascar. It was great. A nice colorful cartoon and some nice dance music. A Lion, Hippo, Giraffe, Zebra and a big bunch of Lemurs. No stress, no wild bizarre creatures. Neither of us were walking on a straight line when we came out of the theater - it ended with dance music I like to move it move it.

یک دو سه، امتحان می کنم

!نمی دونم چی بگم، والا اگه همه می گن خربزه من کی ام که بگم هندوانه

باغ

تو اگر در تپش باغ خدا را دیدی

.... همتی کن و بگو، ماهیها حوضشان بی آب است

Rhett Butler

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" was voted the best movie quote by the American Film Institute in all the US movies made to date. Gone with the Wind is an all time favorite for many and I don't think anyone would disagree that Clark Gable was awesome.

I guess my vote is the closest possible to theirs. I have many times quoted Vivien Leigh on her line right after she closes the door behind Rhett "I will think about that tomorrow" and believe me, it helped me out at times!

خرافات

من فکر نمی کردم دوستان مسیحی اینجور مثل ما خرافاتی باشن

Bush

Like many others I dislike this guy. And honestly I can't resist comparing him to our own leaders. From his not being informed to his middle or even low-class conversations. In many ways I see a lot of analogy between the way he governs the States and ...

So the President of the United States hosts the European Union summit and in the press conference held afterwards answering the question of ... how you see the role of the Luxembourg presidency in that issue?, the issue being US-EU relations, painting his well recognized smile he replies: In terms of your Prime Minister, he's an interesting guy. He's a lot of fun to be around ..... And I was going to say he's a piece of work, but that might not translate too well. Is that all right, if I call you a "piece of work"?

May someone please remind him that he is in a press conference talking about a Prime Minister, not describing a guy to someone on the bus! Making jokes in serious situations is one thing and ... it isn't cute and it isn't even Texas style, it's just ...

chalk

Yesterday the kids in the neighborhood got together and drew a wonderful chalk drawing on the asphalt in the yard. They started when I left to go jogging and they were done an hour later when I got back.

They had silhouettes of themselves in the drawing, which looked very interesting when seen from above. Smart kids! It was big and colorful and it was right under my bedroom window. I especially loved the butterfly and the rainbow.

But it rained today. Or may I say it showered today, and washed away all the drawings. I hope they make a habit of drawing on the ground and I hope the grumpy neighbor which complained about them playing in the yard last year has moved away so I can hear them play outside all Summer long!

G8 - for who?

No comments!

one step closer

It seems that man's long awaited dream is one step closer. We are reaching closer to the stars .... It is hoped that with the launch of Cosmos 1* the first solar powered spacecraft, we will soon learn how to operate solar power spacecrafts which can travel to the stars. The mission has been impossible to date since it is not practical for a spaceship to carry all the required fuel for its journey. However if a spaceship uses solar power, then it can travel unlimited distances ... although I guess it is not meaningful to say the sky will be the limit ... we have to come up with something better ...

* check out its weblog

هر دم از این باغ بری می رسد

من همیشه می گفتم که هیچ وقت نمی شه چیزی رو درباره ایران پیش بینی کرد. ولی حتی من هم هنوز باورم نیست که این بار چی شده! اوایل می گفتم من طرفدار معین هستم ولی هاشمی رای می آره و ته دلم خدا خدا می کردم که اشتباه کرده باشم. حالا باید خدا خدا کنم هاشمی جونم رئیس جمهور بشه

.... باید بگم اگه این یه نقشه واسه عزیز کردن هاشمی بود دمشون گرم! همچین به مرگ گرفتنمون که عاشق تب شدیم

bookkeeping

I love to watch the Daily show with Jon Stewart. From the recent interviews he did two were of particular interest to me. One with Flynt Leveret the author of Inheriting Syria and the second with Kenneth Timmerman the author of Countdown to Crisis THE COMING NUCLEAR SHOWDOWN WITH IRAN. Make note that the latter took place the day before the elections! You might also want to watch his interview with Colin Powell, which in my opinion was not the best he could have done but then ....

dad

Last night as I was falling asleep I remembered the time when I had for some reason got used to breathing through my mouth. Dad had explained to me that aside from the problems caused by air not going through the nose to the lungs, it will also affect my teeth. I understood the words, but not the importance of what he was saying to me. For many nights he would climb the stairs to my bedroom and make sure my mouth was closed when I was asleep ... somehow the habit went away ... I can think of a lot more they went through for me ...

I fell asleep with a big smile, knowing mum and dad will be here soon ... as mum always says, I will always be a little girl to them no matter how old I am.

abortion

Henry Morgentaler is the face behind legalization of abortion in Canada. A few days ago he was awarded an honorary doctorate of Laws from the university of Western Ontario for his work.

There has been a lot of dispute surrounding this subject both in Canada and around the world. Religious extremists are among the many groups campaigning against abortion. Then again, the religious (read:extremists) are against pregnancy prevention and ....

What are these people implying? To me it's simple. They are forcing misery into the lives of two people: the mother and the child. And who benefits, I don't understand!

No one can argue that a mother does not love her child, well at least not in most cases. It's just that something about the timing or the situation is not right. If a mother decides - supposing she has gone through the counseling and whatever else is required to make sure it's not depression leading to the decision - that she does not want to have a baby, it's her call. If some one else is overly concerned about the life of the unborn, they can find a way to take care of the child; but not at the mother's time and expense.

Besides all that, what's the point in bringing an unwanted person into the world? There are already too many children in foster homes and God knows what they go through and how they are treated.

I believe in the gift of life and I am very thankful for having the chance to live, yet, I believe no good is achieved by forcefully granting this gift to an unwelcome child.

photo album

I updated my online photo album the other day. I was kind of forced to. But that made me go through all the photos I had taken at least since January. Wow, I have been having fun! I am so grateful that I can smile when I look into the past ....

the same

"You meet people, they are all the same. They think you are the same as others too. Then there's one person who is not the same as others, and doesn't think you are the same as others either."

-Roz, Frasier

hole

There's a hole in my soul somewhere ... it bothers me ... there's something, I cannot understand ... why? ... but? ...

approval

Seeking approval from others is different from seeking validity for existence. According to psychologists the latter is the one which gets you into trouble. The question remains, how did you get there in the first place? When did you cross the line? How do you step back?
I guess there have been times in everyone's life that they have had to redefine the line ...

From his dad Dr Phil quoted: "You wouldn't worry so much about what people think about you if you knew how seldom they did." Interesting thing to keep in mind!

perfect

Some years ago, every once a while, I would meet someone who was perfect. Someone who would make me wonder how they could be so perfect. And that would make me look forward to the future. To the day I would be more like them.
I haven't seen anyone like that for ages. Is it that those people no more exist? or is it that I feel I have grown up and not that much is going to change, so I don't look forward to the future in that sense? ... can't be, I still dream ... it's probably that it takes more to satisfy me ... but there has to be someone who can do better ...

تنها نیستیم

.... حالا دیگه همه می دونیم که تنها نیستیم، داره باورمون می شه که شاید هم می شه کاری کرد. فقط من نبودم که ذوق زده شدم

Sir Elton Chocolate

So, with my love of chocolate, I have no choice but to visit the Madame Tussauds museum again. Aside from all the new additions they now have Sir Elton Chocolate there!

impatient

What is it with me? Why am I so impatient? I mean it kills me to wait for something. Life has tried to teach me over and over that with a little grace things will take their appropriate path. And yet I never learn. Or may be I do, little by little ... the procedure is rather lengthy ... and I am sure until I fully understand that I can't rush everything, I'll be facing the consequences ....

تبلیغات

.... یادم رفته بود این رو بگذارم اینجا. این یکی روی فضای وب خودمه برای همین باید یه کم صبر داشته باشین، طول می کشه

مرسی بیژن*

شهر ما

.... این مقاله - گرچه سطحی - نگاهی دارد به زندگی طبقه مهاجرایرانی در ونکور

مرسی گلی خانم*

between

I didn't want to put him between a rock and a hard place, but I really don't know what to do?! Worst thing is to keep quiet and let silence speak for you ... you won't really know what you have communicated ... and so I spent half of Sunday dwelling on it ...

مصاحبه

.... من خوشحالم که حداقل می شه این حرفها رو زد. ته دلم خیلی امیدوارشدم که داریم به یک جای خوب می ریم ... چه خوب

مرسی سارا خانم*

متاسفانه این لینک دیگه کار نمی کنه و الان هم نمی تونم فایل رو جایی بگذارم که قابل دسترسی باشه**

هورا متن مصاحبه***

bears

The other night I was telling my brother that he should be careful about the bear sightings on campus, but he wasn't paying much attention. I told him that I am not joking and he will remember it when he runs into a bear. Still staring at his laptop, he answered: "I will only see them if they come to study in the library, I don't live in their habitat like you". True, my work place is in the woods ...

you are not me

It's hard to be me, believe me. It's hard, and yet I somehow manage ... I do things my own way, in my own time, in my own space, and yet I somehow manage ... sometimes, I can't manage the best possible, but I keep at it until for some reason I think I've dedicated enough time and energy ... and remember, you are not me!

weather forecast

I am going to set up a website and post weather forecasts. I am sure I will do just as good as the irresponsible weather network . The past few days I have realized that looking out the window I do better predictions than them, even for the next five days!
If you don't live in beautiful Vancouver you might not be as interested as us in the weather. Checking the weather is one of the major hobbies we share here. It is not unusual for us to go through all four seasons in one day. And sometimes, just sometimes, we get stuck in Autumn for a few days when it's supposed to be Spring ....

i missed them

It's been a few months - I can't beleive it - that I have been getting together with a group of people I didn't know until the gatherings started. Last week was the first time we missed our weekly get together - we were all busy and we just skipped it.
I never noticed when and how I had become so close to them. Each of them in thier own way, I missed them! I have got to let them know, I am so glad that we're meeting again.

distant couples

I am bringing this up mostly as an observation. I know it still needs a lot of thought and, observation.

It happened again. A couple I knew separated. The thing I am seeing over and over about people who bond while one is living back home and the other is living somewhere else in the world. It seems they break up as soon as one moves to join the other.
I mostly blame it on the person who moves - whether they go back home or they move out of Iran. Knowing the pressures of adopting to a new environment, I have moved quite a few times in my lifetime, I can't pitch much of the blame on the person who isn't experiencing the change. And believe me, I have had the experience both ways.
But why do we break? Why do we think our partner is among the very many reasons we are confused and in a shock?
Logically you know it. You understand that your partner is not responsible for any of the problems that spring up. Aside from the new things that hit you every now and then, many of which you expected to be the other way around, may be you feel your partner is too laid back. Does not understand how worrisome things are. Does not pay enough attention to you or your situation. May be the scare from the new environment stimulates you to expect more from your partner, who may not clearly understand what you are going through.
Whatever the cause, from there the argument turns to "instead of supporting me you are adding to the difficulties" and we can all tell the tale from there ....
As you would expect culturally, women are more tolerant; and thus, from experience, I would say the relationship is less prone to dysfunctional symptoms when the woman is the one moving to a new place - don't read this so that it sounds feminist.
I should mention that the above arguments mostly hold when people are living together for the first time. The situation is totally different if they move together - which seems to strengthen a bond - or if they have lived together before - read:gotten to know one another well .... TO BE CONTIUNED

social

The ring-tailed Lemur is probably the most social mammal I have ever heard of - I think I can say animal, other types of animals are not that social anyways. They like to live in big groups - wonder if I can join! And just so they can follow each other in the jungles of Madagascar, their habitat, they have long tails with these rings on them. Evolution at its extent!
They also use their tails as a means to spread their scent in mating season. None of the other thirty-something types of Lemurs have such decorated tails and neither of them live in such big groups!
Oh, one more thing, they sunbathe and walk on the ground which is rear for Lemurs.

deja vu

I heard Dr Brown author of The Deja Vu Experience talking on the Daily Planet. He counted three reasons for experiencing deja vu - an experience repeated 2 to 3 times a year for some people.

• Brain problems - offset signaling from various parts of the brain or hicupps in the part of the brain which is responsible for detecting familiarities.
• Partial experiences in the past - not exactly what you see now but something similar occurred in the past which you do not fully recall.
• Split perception - you take a glance at a place, when you look back you think you are remembering it from the past; true, but the past is seconds ago!

I think I experience this phenomenon, but I wonder what the reason is?!

they'll leave today

Stanley Park, Vancouver, BC, Canada

convocation

It was one of the best times I have had in my life. I really enjoyed it. My dear dear sister, my little brother and my wonderful friends made it even more memorable. I did so very deeply miss mum and dad, but they'll be here soon enough so ...

Convocation mall before the ceremony

Awaiting my turn!

The piece of paper I was dieing for!

complicated

Why is it like this? Why does everything have to be so complicated?
Is it me? Do I make things complicated? Do I think too much? Do I take the hardest route possible through everything?
I don't know. What I do know is that, it's just too complicated ... that's all, too complicated ... It makes me dizzy. Can't I just have a simple life? Can't it be so that fewer things pop up in my life? Have I complained too much now? Am I making a mess? ....

they don't know

They'll never know. I won't say anything. It will be too complicated if they know ....

*خيلي خسته ام… خيلي

الان حدود 1 سال است که خيلي خسته ام و اين هفته آخر هم که ديگه دارم از پا مي افتم. چرا ؟ هميشه فکر مي کردم کمي تنبل ام اما حالا دقيقا حساب کرده ام و متوجه شده ام که خيلي کار مي کنم. ببينيد ما توي ايران 72 ميليون جمعيت داريم که 13 ميليون اونها بازنشسته هستند. پس مي مونه 59 ميليون نفر. از اين تعداد، 24 ميليون دانش آموز و دانشجو هستند يعني براي انجام کارها فقط 35 ميليون نفر باقي مي مونند. توي کشور 10 ميليون نفر هم توي ادارات دولتي شاغل هستند که خب عملا کاري انجام نمي دن. پس براي پيش بردن کارها تنها 25 ميليون نفر باقي مي مونند. از اين 25 ميليون نفر هم تقريبا 4 ميليون نفر آخوند و ملا و سانسورچي اينترنت و نماينده مجلس هستند پس فقط 21 ميليون باقي مي مونن و اگر بدونيم که تقريبا 17 ميليون آدم جوياي کار داريم، معنيش اين خواهد بود که کل کارهاي مملکت رو 4 ميليون نفر دارن انجام مي دن. اما حدود 2 ميليون نفر هم نيروهاي مسلح داريم و اين يعني فقط 2 ميليون نفر نيروي کار باقي مي مونن. از بين اين دو ميليون نفر، 646.900 عضو پليس و وزارت اطلاعات و نيروهاي سرکوب هستند پس کلا مي مونيم 1.353.100. حالا اين وسط 649.876 نفر بيمار داريم که قدرت کار ندارند و بار کارهاي کشور افتاده روي دوش 806.200 نفر از جمعيت. فراموش کردم بگم که ما حدود 806.186 نفر هم ممنوع القلم، ممنوع التصوير، ممنوع الصدا و ديگر انواع زنداني داريم پس کل کارهاي کشور افتاده روي دوش 14 نفر! از اين چهار ده نفر 12 تاشون عضو شوراي نگهبان هستند و پس متوجه مي شيم که کل کارهاي کشور افتاده روي دوش دو نفر: من و تو ! و تو هم که داري وبلاگ مي خوني

..... این مطلب رو یه همکلاسی قدیمی واسم فرستاده، از نویسنده اش اطلاعی ندارم *

.پ.ن. مثل اینکه پیدا شد**